Tuesday, September 11

To Sarah Lula

I am writing you this, here, because I have been a douche and neglected you for too long.
I guess this is my attempt at amends.
I guess that with time, your awesomeness has faded (only in my memory darling) due to your absence, which at first devesteted me, then faded to a dull ache, and finally, to normalcy.
Trust me, I know you're still awesome, probably even more awesome than the last time I saw you (almost a year ago! Jeezus!). But without your company as a constant reminder, it is on the back burner.
I hate long distance relationships.
I want to come and visit you, but now I am a poor bartending college student. I ate two packets of instant oatmeal yesterday, with half and half because I don't have any milk, because I am stuck in the bowels of poverty. The only thing lower is Ramen noodles.
OMG, I just looked at a sugar packet and a neat little brown stamp says MAUI! WTF?
I want to tell you to move back, but that would be ridonkulous because, duh, I should move there, to Hawaii.
I lost my momentum.
I just wanted to say that I do still love you, even though I suck at showing it....
I guess you'll have to accept me as the massive turd that I am...
Or not...
But I love you and think you're amazing, and miss hearing you sing anyway....

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

good words, my feelings exactly. Na Ja.
glad to hear you are applying that intellect.

Unknown said...

Funny you mention the little lady. She called me out of the blue a few nights ago.

John said...

How appropriate, even if subconscious... the memory of a friend on 9/11. It's strange and still on my mind because I had just finished Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close that you recommended.

sarahlulasachmo said...

am crying. just now. o.k. it's passed. thank you. i am much more awesome than you remember, that much is true. i can accept you as you are. because i love you, turd, even despite your love for broccoli (which, i'm all to happy to imagine,you can't afford. it is of the devil!). i'm sorry. i hope you don't take insult to my mention that you can't afford broccoli. your sacrafices will pay off. someday i'll see you again, i hope. until then i'll remain distantly your friend and await the day i can relieve you of my affects, which i'm sorry to have stressed about. i hope you can understand my being unsettled at the realization of my disconnection with a close friend who has some of the only sentimental things i care about in this world. and i'm sorry for burdening you with them. on a much lighter note, fuck, i think this is not the place to leave you a lengthy message for all to read but i feel more secure that you'll READ it here, anyway... i have four songs recorded and more on the way at a rate of about 2/week. i'd like to send a copy to you, though not via the computer b/c they're not copywritten yet. let me know if you're interested.