ten thous and hurts ledge end

As I predicted yesterday in a moment of precognitive clarity, I went out to get a job today. I probably got one, but I don’t want to say ‘I definitely have this job’ just incase I don’t, but I definitely have this job. I’ll soon be working at the Embassy Suites, meeting rappers and past their prime rockers i.e. Bon Jovi, getting a minor discount on my meals while at work, and two, yes you heard correctly, TWO paid fifteen minute breaks per shift.
Holla! Whatevs, it’s better than the ‘other’ job.
In the event that any of you are wondering what the ‘other’ job is that I’m referring to, I’ll enlighten you; I was a cocaine importer/distributor king pin ala Escobar, only more bettuh-uh because it’s me.
I know you’re thinking, “Candice, how could you ever want to leave a life of coke addicted, yet beautiful women, insincere friendships based on fear, deception, and lucrative opportunities, and rock bottom discounted drugs at your disposal?” (I’m sure I transcribed your thoughts verbatim there) to which I reply, “see the first paragraph where I mention the TWO fifteen minute breaks I’ll be receiving, then go ahead and feel embarrassed at even thinking of asking such a ridiculous question.”

I have to pee promptly.

I’m going over to my friend Jen’s house in a bit for Thai curry and general conviviality and Southeast Asian reminiscence. I’m bringing her some nail polish I got from freecycle, for free duh, so she can make more of her amazing paintings that I’m sure you just saw when you clicked on the link that is her name. CLICK IT!
She doesn’t know she’s about to receive 20+ bottles of nail polish. No idea. She is so going to diarrhea her thong in excitement!

I’m listening to Air’s 10,000 HZ Legend. It’s phenomenal. Listen to it.
My favorite is Lucky and Unhappy…ahhhhhh! It’s soooo good. It’s the kind of song that makes you feel really alive, or like you’re about to die. I reckon that’s the same feeling.
Also Wonder Milky Bitch kicks ass. I don’t necessarily like the title, but it does this ‘nyer, nyer’ thing. If you listen, you will know what I’m talking about. It makes you feel like you are in So I Married An Axe Murderer at the Poets Corner, and it’s storming and you are being moved by mahogany wood, sweet pipe tobacco smoke, and introspective spoken word poetry. You are also wearing a beret. It is awesome.

Okay, now it is tomorrow from what you just read which was yesterday from what you are presently reading. Here's the clencher...I'm still listening to 10,000 HZ Legend. I'm not going to kick Boards of Canada out of their presitigous position on the throne of Candice's favorite of all favorites. But I now dub Air queen of this fair land.
I'm going to tell you something now, which is a scientifically proven fact: EVERY song on that album is beautiful/amazing/haunting/gut wrenching/life changing.
If you disagree, you disagree with both science and god, who, for once in history, have their stories straight. But even more importantly, you disagree with me, and that I cannot abide.
Here are the lyrics to Lucky and Unhappy:

do I need? / destiny
do I need? / schedule life
do I need? / venus joy
do I need? / recess lines

lucky and unhappy
vote for a freestyle life
lucky and unhappy
driving on the freeway flash line

do I feel? / helium dreams
do I feel? / fresh impacts
do I feel? / hot joy nights
do I feel? / jessica

lucky and unhappy
vote for the freestlye life
lucky and unhappy
driving on the freeway flash line

You have to hear it, if I ever told you to do anything, even more important than not to try and breathe underwater because that may actually work (don't be a cynic), I'm telling you, if you want to get into heaven or attain Nirvana or even get a tax refund this year, listen to this song please, it's not like any of you even left me comments for my birthday (except the Tiffers) so do this one thing for me, it will change your religion.

You know what I just learned? Air is on their first North American tour in 3 years, and since god hates me, they don't seem to be coming anywhere near Texas. Actually, they have a date in Arizona, but from Austin to Phoenix is nearly 1,000 miles, and incase you weren't able to glean this bit of information from the fact that I was looking for a job, I am poor.

This is Soviet Russia!

The governement doesn't love me. Contact your local congressman and urge him/her to vote for Air to come to Texas (they probably aren't coming because, hello, this is Texas, and there are loads of Bush supporters here, and Bush supporters, i.e. war mongers, hate the French, but earth to Air, I don't hate the French since I am liberal and also French by descent), or at least ask them to loan me some money to get to Phoenix.

Preserve the armistice!
Viva la Revolucion!