This is one of THOSE posts

I think I like being alone more than with anyone.

When I'm alone, there's nothing to pretend. No talking for the sake of talking, no acting like I feel better than I feel for the sake of being good company. I don't have to be some version of myself. I'm just myself.

I can not talk all day, get lost in my thoughts, sing without self consciousness, and fart without embarrassment. I can eat my store-bought sushi in the driver's seat of my car and when I'm done, I can sit in the HEB parking lot, windows down, enjoying this perfect day, just because I feel like it...
I have no secrets from myself, no hidden thoughts, there's no quiet bitterness of self consciousness. There's the wonderful freedom of being with the one person in the world who knows me completely, and accepts me that way.
I keep my secrets with myself. We know how to keep things on the DL.

Sometimes I imagine this enormous world inside of me, and I'm amazed. Then I imagine every other person I see, walking around with just as colossal and complex of universes inside them, and I am flabbergasted.
I don't feel I'll ever be able to exhaust my terrain. I wonder if other people feel the same.
I know that you don't always present to the world what you really are/think/feel inside. Surely tons of people keep up a simple front, but on the inside....

How could anyone tire of exploring their own unknown?
Maybe some people are scared. I know that when faced with a space vast enough to appear infinite, terror is a common reaction. Perhaps that's why some seek the constant company of others; to distract each other from the undiscovered within.

When I take time to look inside, I discover that every thought is poignant, every moment is documentable, every idea novel, and that, yes, you make a movie from my life.

Maybe that's just me.
Maybe I'm just more awesome that everyone else.
Maybe other's inner worlds are more akin to 90210 (the new one duh) than chaotic cosmos of resplendent captivation.
It's hard to say.